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  THEY COME
"Bud was allowing every primal and animal fiber in his body to take over, all moral awareness was fading into grayness. All that existed now was the urge to kill, to exterminate another human life."
      THE WALK
"There were lines upon lines of ants, marching across the ground toward his face. Climbing into his nostrils, infiltrating his scalp, biting his eardrums until they bled."

This is a gut wrenching story about an African slave who finally gets his freedom. To celebrate he decides to take a long walk, savoring all the things in his path. Until he meets some questionable people and creatures that have nothing but bad intentions on their minds.

Bud is working in a mail room by day, but at night he lives in another world. A world that holds a dark and dangerous secret. Follow Bud on his nightly escapades and see how he has emersed himself in a live or die fight for honor, glory, and supremacy.

In the suburbs of Ohio sits a dilapidated exotic animal rescue. Its inhabitants are about to be set free and end up in a fight for their very lives. It's man versus animal in the all too familiar setting of our own backyards.

Sigmund had stuffed just about every animal that ever lived. He only had one more critter to taxidermy before finally retiring. His nimble fingers were tired and crooked. With just one last job what could possibly go wrong? And what are those strange noises coming from the meat locker?

  PROWLER
"Kafka just stared, his eyes focused, burning like two desert suns. Kafka watched and waited, the smell of raw flesh so much closer now. It teased his receptors, stirring his wildness."
 
THE TAXEDERMIST
"Hanging on a blunted hook was the body of a large chipanzee. Its limp frame swaying ever so slightly in the frigid air being pushed around by the circulation fan. Impossibly it lifted its head. Its dead, runny, eyes staring overhead. It grinned.

                     HARLAND'S SHORT STORIES.

For years I have been writing short stories but never ever showed them to anyone. Now, I think it's time. My stories might surprise you as they delve into some of the darker themes of life versus the comedic themes I am best known for. If you feel advernterous please have a read or listen to me read to you through an audio book. Either way, I hope you enjoy my stories.

HARLAND'SHUMORBOOKS

This book is filled with the

most incredible facts you

don't know you don't know.

 

DID YOU KNOW THAT JESUS COULD NOT WALK ON BOTTLED WATER? DID YOU KNOW MARSHMALLOWS ARE JUST GHOST TURDS? DID YOU KNOW THAT SOUP IS JUST OLD PEOPLE'S BATH WATER?

 

BUY THIS BOOK AND FIND OUT SO MUCH MORE. YOU WILL BE AMAZED AT ALL THE THINGS YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU DON'T KNOW.

 

CURENTLY THE HARLAND STORE IS OUT OF COPIES, BUT CLICK ON THE LINKS BELOW TO ORDER ONLINE..

    THE VISITOR

Sharon’s eyes closed shut as the creatures mouth ravaged her mouth, her eyes rolling back in her head, just allowing the creature do what he would, she did not resist one bit.

Down between her legs she could feel its elongated fingers slowly pull her thong to the side......

           4 QUESTIONS

After a few minutes of silence she spoke again, in a sad voice, “If life is everything then how come there’s hate?”

“Is that your second question?” Sid asked respectfully.

“What?”

“Hate. Are you asking me what hate is?”

Sandy thought for a moment and then turned back and looked at him, directly in his eyes, “Yes, tell me what hate is.”

Sid took a moment to think before he spoke. He looked at Sandy and thought about her predicament, about why she was standing on a bridge ready to jump off.

Sharon had been living alone on her farm since her husband died. After more than ten years she couldn't seem to connect with anyone. Her world had become lonely and isolated, until one night a mysterious visitor arrived. What did the visitor want, what did it need? Why was it hiding in the barn, and why was Sharon so drawn to it? Perhaps it would take an X-rated night of passion to finally break Sharon out of the coccoon of grief and emptiness she had built around herself.

Sid had driven the same bus route his whole career. His favorite part of the drive was across the back of the mighty Harlem Bridge. Today was his last day and then he would be retired. Little did Gus know that this was to be the most powerful day of his life. Destiny bringing him face to face with someone who no longer had the will to live.

 THE GARDEN HOSE TIME MACHINE

Bret's father spoke from the hospital bed with his weak and dying voice, "The things that happen to you in life, you don't see em' comming Bretty. You think you're prepared for everything. You think you can plan it all out. And then, all of a sudden, one night, a part of you appears that you never planned for. Something inside of you shows up that you didn't even know you had."

Bret's humdrum life changed one day when he drank from the garden hose in his backyard. Suddenly, he was transported back to the magic of his youth as well as to one of the darkest days of his life. Every time he drinks from the hose he gets closer to confronting something that had scarred him deeply. Terrified but needing resolution, Bret keeps returning to the garden hose to drink, even if it costs him his  job, his family, his sanity!